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  • Writer's pictureadrgomez

Changing Me Softly

Updated: Feb 24, 2023

Progress arrived with quick and easy solutions that we couldn't resist. Thus we scan for good vibes hoping they permeate our membranes so that change happens to us. Whether taking the youth pill, changing our minds with hypnosis or manifesting, we all aspire to solve something in our lives. As exciting as that sounds, it is also intoxicating. This has only made us more fragile because, deep down, we know that finding wellness requires honesty and work; deep down, we sense we will fail because we don't have the energy for what it may actually take.

In my previous post, I wrote about Home Within and Decoding The Subtle Nature Of My Purpose.I was looking for coherence in my life, but my problems felt bigger than me, and I had little energy. I started exploring some basic ideas without committing to goals or outcomes; as strange as this may sound, I was intuitively going beyond and below words.

My starting point was: I am a System of Body, Heart, Mind and Soul. Wanting to use my entire human resource, I planned to experience myself through a holistic lens. I would call this approach: my Home Within. Without realising it, I was cementing new rules to live by.


Mindset I

Getting out of the Cockpit

We live in our minds with a lot of mechanical thoughts. In his book Breaking the Habit of being yourself, Joe Dispenza says that we repeat 98% of our thoughts one day after the other because, from our minds, we establish an automated system. We rely almost exclusively on our brain power; we decide it's from our cockpit from where we process all data and make choices.

When we feel happy, successful, or even just ok, we feel confident our minds know how to lead us. Thus, we shop, eat and consume in an infinite loop of pleasure and pursuit of tangible goals. This allows us to ignore the deeper truths.

It stopped working for me. I needed a break from my creative and hyperactive mind, so I distanced myself from my thoughts. I tried moving out of my cockpit every time I could and observed the nature of my inner narrator. I was transferring the basic skills learned during meditation.


Mindset II

Connecting heart, body and soul

Our minds mechanically and systematically hide things that are emotionally difficult for us. They elaborate logical stories so that we can sweep uncomfortable truths beyond our conscious minds. To avoid that, I started “noticing” my day-to-day experiences and confronted arising negative or limiting thoughts. I revised my interpretation of facts and listened to my body and emotions; I created a holistic inner environment that allowed me to process and overcome rather than sweep stuff into my subconscious. I started with simple things, and as I progressed, my life expanded.

When I shifted my mindset, I empowered my Home Within (my entire system), and my mind became a part of something bigger and became subject to revision. Below is an example of a holistic internal dialogue.



They all say it

The well-being industry is leading the conversation towards the same goal. Joe Dispenza, Deepak Chopra, The Dalai Lama, Martha Beck, Sadhguru, Mooji, Tony Robbins, Eckhart Tolle, Jeffrey Allen, Vishen Lakhiani, and Oprah, to name a some. They are all saying we need to revise what happens inside of us. Yet we watch these gurus for hours but remain the same. Our minds lead us into this self-help pattern of looking outwards because it's disengaged from our entire system. It doesn't know well how to do it, and/or it's out of practice.

A new wave of meditators, mindfulness experts, spiritual teachers, and coaches are "awakening" as they practice living inwards because that's what eventually happens. Being awakened separates our life experience from the enveloping architecture of the mind. It’s about paying attention as life unfolds and discovering nuances of the self.

The problem with our minds is that beyond processing data, we create interpretations and make correlations to craft stories. Our minds nurture our identity and sense of self, built from external input over time. We build personas, and our ego defends this architecture with all its might. When we systematise this, we operate under our mind ceiling.



Honesty paves the road to truth.

Martha Beck offers powerful insight into making distinctions between our beliefs and what is actually true about us:

"Define virtue as living in perfect alignment with what you most deeply feel to be true, and happiness as an upwelling of joy that arises directly from this alignment, regardless of external factors...Alignment in, joy out." Martha Beck

Like in journalism, one must check facts and revise one's entire system to notice what was fed into our brains. Initially, it is tough, but over builds muscle :)

Practising honesty:

For example, my cockpit would say, "I can't write a blog in English". Was that a fact? No. I had to correct the language. The truth sounded more like: "I'm scared of writing blog posts in English. I will expose myself, and I'll be judged." I dismantled and organised all the obstacles behind this truth and gave myself permission to fail. How else does one learn?

As with everything I design, if I found the end result interesting, being judged was beyond me. It was not my problem. I connected with my emotions to check my fears: "What must I process inside to make this happen?" Gradually, one finds peace of mind in resolving these questions. One finds total coherence. When you know, you know, right? Of course, getting into the right flow is not easy.

It takes courage to be compassionate and generous with ourselves. A silly fear of starting a blog led to something rather profound. I was questioning my emotions, and I noticed something. I believed that to survive in life, I had to be fierce and relentless to overcome adversity. As I explored my Home Within, I realised that what I projected outwards, I also projected inwards. I was rough and implacable with myself. I was beyond revising a fear of blogging, I was now noticing my inner critic's character and tone.



Home Within is a life journey of dissolving beliefs to reveal our true nature, and finding joy and self-love. We mirror into the world who we are inside; it's also the lens we use to experience it. Changing inside changes our living outside. Vishen Lakhiani and Wayne Dyer clarify: "The universe doesn't give us what we want; it gives us what we are". Manifestation occurs as we become, as we breach our mental ceiling.

The great thing about Home Within was that I began dismantling small, workable, untruthful thoughts. As I experienced a better flow, I felt compelled to explore more and over time I built muscle. This way of living has its reward system and opens us to a new dimension worth exploring.

We have made life so complex, we are so full of data, that we no longer live in simple ways. That's why this may sound hard. Nevertheless, our system, our Home Within, is wise, and science and spirituality are giving us an edge. Next, I will share ways and techniques that helped me find breakthroughs.

Thanks! I hope you enjoyed this read.

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